Soooo I haven't done my imposed assignment...I would say I tried, but in a previous blog I said I don't like the word try.:) Anyway what I did do kind of sucked. I took pictures of roads/trails around my house. I hate taking landscape pictures unless it is of the sky. I love sky pictures...I can feel a rabbit trail coming on.:)
Sooo I know why I like to take sky pictures. I use to love playing the game when I was little of looking into a blue sky with lots of fluffy clouds, and paint pictures in my mindseye with the clouds. It is actually one of my favorite childhood memories. I had this spot under a bunch of dogwood trees that I would lay under. I can remember how the grass felt under me, and the occassional ant bite and how I felt just utterly perfect. All my cares gone. I am shedding a tear right now. Why is it when we look back on our childhoods and remember the utter ignorance we lived in we cry, or at least I do? Is it cause I grieve for that little girl whom is now long forgotten, or will be.
My sister told me something recently that has really stuck with me. I told her how I told my 13 year old daughter who is quite the looker whom everyone in my family says looks just like me, that if I had know how gorgeous I was at 13 I would have been something. My sister shocked me quite good, by saying I was prettier.:) I can remember looking in the mirror at about that age, and liking what I saw back. It didn't compute though, because the awfulness I received at a new school I was enrolled in didn't compute with the reflection I saw in the mirror. I always liked pretty people, why didn't they? I still struggle with that particular computation. I wish though I could have seen myself as my sister saw me way back when. I think it would have made things alot easier, maybe not. I don't think it would have changed others treatment of me....but at least then I would know they were idiots instead of thinking I must have been the dumb one.
God's sweet girl,
Angie
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